Wednesday, April 13, 2011


Just feel like, if I can't somehow figure this out NOW... that I'm never going to figure it out.
All I want to do is bury myself in the mundane routine of my life so I don't have time to screw up. So that I don't have time to get into trouble. Goodbye facebook. Goodbye phone. Time to find some solid vacant ground to sit awhile.

I'm exactly the same.
I don't know why I keep thinking I'm different.
I'm not. Dear God, I'm so sorry I'm not.
I've kind of become a bottle for a lot of people's angst.
Whose mine?

Crying and driving isn't a good combination.
I have questions. I'm searching for answers.
I want my heart to be one with His.
I haven't been receiving guidance. There hasn't been a clear answer for so long.
Nothing has felt crystal clear in awhile. Everything is murky. Nothing is making any sense.
I'm afraid all the time. I feel like I can't move. I'm in the dark.

Today Bro. Jacobs saved my life. Again. Every class period I feel as though my situation has been "saved". Not matter what it is. Big or small.

"If you're not getting answers, if you can't hear a response to your earnest prayers-put it on the back burner. Don't let it effect your faith. Remember you have more answers than most of the world population. You are blessed."

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