26

80's? 80's?
(the only thing good about this is the color)


Further and further away.
I've made efforts to halt the dilution.
Nothing is working. So far.

I can't fathom why this gully has emerged.
And what do I make a gangplank out of? Hope? Faith? Good Works? All of the above?
But I must say I prefer this "absence" more than a powerhouse bolt-from-the-blue to my tender face.
Keep on pushing on I suppose. Or does it go "Keep on keeping on"? (That's it!)

Whatevs. *shrugs* Either way the saying isn't on MY "top 10" list.
*looks around*

I began conversing with my friend (pink ja ja-jellybean) about the past. It's always fun to summon back those memories (Accio Memories!) (some of them, not all of course).
So many embarrassing moments.
And I don't care who you are, what you say, who you THINK you know (trust me, this is relevant)- I have the MOST EMBARRASSING MAKE OUT STORY EVER!
Hands down. Absolutely no questions asked.

Anyone wanting "in" ( or "out" now that I come to think of it) on this monumental shake in Chelsea's Life, well.. you know - I know you do- where to locate me.

I purchased a brand spankin' new, three-quarter sleeve shirt today.
Whoooopee right? So what? Who cares! Throw your hands in the A-ir!
Well it represents more than just my personal style ( or "non-style" as Dot prefers) and SOS [sense of self]

It's signif!
It exhibits the changes that I've made in my life, everything from the thread-count to the color has some kind of minute detail of importance to me. I'm not wearing it until the 15th of April. In fact I'm not even going to LOOK at it until then.
And I can't wait! How many more days is that?
*thinks*

Don't care.
Irrelevant.

*pauses to help lift brother*

"We need to find you a man that you love as much as you love this dog."

Perhaps.
I fear it will never happen. HA! Just kidding. Only part of me believes that.
The other part is becoming increasingly agigtated and anxious about the upcoming months in her life. (My life)

I trust I'm not interpretting things wrong (this could very well be the case), but... I know it's coming.

This. year. (there I finally spewed that out there)
I'm going to be as bold as to say that. And I'll eat my words (then vomit-blegh- them back up UP and consume again) if it doesn't happen.


And now, the main event. Brace yourselves ( I hope everyone realizes that I say most of this for my own benefit-)
*braces myself*


I miss JL.
Not the work- no no no never never never!!!
I miss being away from home ( no drama). I miss the friendships (staying up late and laughing in the dark). I miss being busy(even if work sucked-[insert some word here]). I miss being in the forest.(although I wouldn't trade anything for the canyon in my back yard)

*sighs*
Glad I could get that out of my system. My only comforting thought is that my soul mate (Ms. Meggae Reggae Fresh) feels the same way.
I almost cried thinking about her the other night.
She understood me so well.
I dote on her tremendously.
And I haven't seen or talked to her in ages. We're drifting apart, which was bound to happen. And I don't think that we'll ever fully lose contact or anything, but things aren't (can't) be the way they were before because... of Life.

But I crave her presence in my life right now.
"Forever" by Chris Brown.

Don't forget Meggae.



Confessions:

I'm OCD (outragiously capsizing deliveries) about the mail.
I need those letter. BOTH of them. I check the mail at 9 am, even though the post usually doesn't come until about 4.

I am making NO effort to get a job. Concerning said "effort"- There is effort, but compared to how it should be- on the scale I sit at 0 (zero).

I am developing a phobia of food. And a compulsary need to excersize all day long.

compulsary. I first heard this word in Thailand used by a man named Zack. And boy was he a looker. And a mover.