Saturday, June 12, 2010


I've just woken up from a nap.
And I had probably the most disgusting dream-um nightmare- to date.
I was going through this test-experiment by experiment- to see how far I'd go to defend my life. It involved me fighting or doing this or that with or to another person.
And I thought it was odd that while I never knew her name, that it was just another female the same age as me. Not a male. And I wonder if that would have changed the outcome in the experiments?

And I'm ashamed to say I think my dream self would do just about anything.
There was everything from -would you break every bone in this person's body ( keep in mind I'm having to actually DO these things to "prove it" or something)- to- take out this persons jaw and teeth with a baseball bat- to much worse things that I can't stomach.

It went on and on becoming more torturous and gruesome until I finally woke up.
I was shocked.
Did I really just visualize myself doing all those things? Because in real life- I'd rather die. And I know that without a doubt. I. Would. Rather. Die. than do some of the things I did to that woman.


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